http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/ A Modern Waka Workshop Wed, 26 Aug 2009 18:07:42 GMT Shin02143@... http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9321 http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9321 Shorter days are bringing cooler evenings; crickets chirp, and with dwindling sunlight my eyelids grow heavy. Rick [Non-text portions of this message have been Tue, 25 Aug 2009 11:34:52 GMT kigen_photos http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9320 http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9320 A very enlightened response, poet friend. Tue, 25 Aug 2009 01:15:32 GMT Shin02143@... http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9319 http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9319 Thank you, Kigen. I was more thinking of the Pure Land in the West when I wrote the last line. I am not familiar with the koan tradition except at a Tue, 25 Aug 2009 01:11:18 GMT Shin02143@... http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9318 http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9318 Thank you, Donna, "flicker" works better than "flickering." Rick Fanning myself in the crushing evening heat; fireflies flicker as the full moon rises and my Tue, 25 Aug 2009 00:27:01 GMT kigen_photos http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9317 http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9317 I came across two Japanese tanka about things frail but not old, and I thought it was a nice counterpoint to the theme of aging. The first by a man, the second Tue, 25 Aug 2009 00:22:45 GMT donna ferrell http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9316 http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9316 Rick,  I like this.  I wonder if you might try just "flicker" instead of "flickering."  I think it sounds better especially since there are already 3 Mon, 24 Aug 2009 12:42:44 GMT Shin02143@... http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9315 http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9315 Fanning myself in the crushing evening heat; fireflies flickering as the full moon rises and my thoughts turn westward. Rick [Non-text portions of this message Sun, 23 Aug 2009 16:07:29 GMT bettewappner http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9314 http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9314 Hi Donna, Thank you for the suggestions. After I posted it I realized that it was probably too busy with elements, so I do agree with you. I also discovered Sun, 23 Aug 2009 00:16:46 GMT donna ferrell http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9313 http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9313 Thanks for sharing, Bette. I liked your first one very much.   This one I think has a little too much in it so that it becomes distracting.. I think the Sat, 22 Aug 2009 18:20:41 GMT bettewappner http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9312 http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9312 In late August grass under the old apple tree, young rabbits graze-- their nest under the kayak ashore for years by the lilies. Bette. Sat, 22 Aug 2009 15:48:25 GMT bettewappner http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9311 http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9311 Since springtime, abandoned weeds have grown, hiding summer blossoms-- though wild vines cling to the house they provide shade and solace. Bette. Sat, 22 Aug 2009 14:01:54 GMT bettewappner http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9310 http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9310 Kigen, This verse is very lovely. Thank you for sharing it and for inspiring. Bette. Sat, 22 Aug 2009 14:00:13 GMT bettewappner http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9309 http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9309 I enjoyed your waka very much, Kigen. Thank you :) Bette. Sat, 22 Aug 2009 11:49:25 GMT kigen_photos http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9308 http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9308 The river's breadth is narrowed by abundant water hyacinths too late for flowering but green and profoundly quiet. by Takaori Taeko Just to note that this was Wed, 19 Aug 2009 22:33:15 GMT kigen_photos http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9307 http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Mountain-Home/message/9307 Donna and all, Thanks for your kind comment Sunny and correction Richard! Donna these poems are FANTASTIC. I love everything about them, both form and